[Letter from Elizabeth Upshur Teackle to her daughter, Elizabeth Ann Upshur Teackle, March 24, 1817]

P.A. March 24th

My dearest child

You are actually one of the most punctual little correspondents in the world and a strict adherence to the letter, of your duty. What a sea of difficulties you had wade through in writing this last letter! A perfect ocean of watertubs, according to Sterne's french Barber's idea of one. When he spoke of the perriwig "Sir you may immerse it in the ocean." "An Englishman" says Sterne, "wou'd never have had an idea of any sublimer object than a bucket of water." Now what sort of figure wou'd your favourite Blair, call this of the frenchman's? In poetry we shou'd call it the Bathos, or art of [slipping?]. (particularly as the poor perriwig wou'd have stood a narrow chance of drowning if the Barber's ordeal had been tried) or the coupling great ideas with little ones. Blair wou'd call it an hyperbole.

What part of your letter shall I answer first? It is made up of one element only. Unless the scrubbing brushes are another, viz. water. The best answer to a watertub is a mop. And this letter of mine, I predict, is to be a moping one and my authority for the assertion is the very

deplorable phantom of a pun just emitted. However, I hold to my promises. A sleepy writer must of necessity give birth to a moping letter. And I am of that quiescent order just now, dinner being sometimes a great soporiphic with me, and I have just dined.

Now whilst I think of it, I want you to send me a small lock of your longest curling hair from behind your head, such as will make a plait. Don't forget it. Send it in your next letter.

I wish I cou'd get an opportunity to send your linnens. They say Nonwiller will soon be down with a new carriage for somebody. Perhaps I may get him to carry them.

You must tell your aunt Bancker not to give up her visit to us. For if she does, I shall set her down as a woman of no pith at all. She must not suffer small matters to impede her. I calculate certainly on seeing her and your uncle,and shall be truly mortified if I am disappointed. Moreover she must calculate on giving us a long visit. For Mrs. Eyre will be angry, I know, if they do not go as far as N-n, where I am ready to wait on them. Or shall be I hope. Give my love to all friends my

dear.

I hope to see you father soon. I cannot tell you how heavily my evenings pass all alone, except when Henrietta can be spared to me, which is now seldom. My eyes are too much affected to suffer me to read at night. And in the day I can read I can read but a few pages. I do nothing but knit. My peas are not quite above ground although they have been in three weeks. You never [knew] our garden so backward as this season. However, we have some appearances of vegetation, and also a few stock [torn page] flowers in bloom very pretty [torn page].

Your father has not mentioned your harp in his last letter, but he will not forget it. I long to hear you play on it. Your aunt Nelly thought your last letter was an amazing handsome one. I am always pleased to have your remarks on what you read. N is a very good practice too, and serves to strengthen your memory, and excercise your mind.

God bless and preserve you my dear child. You are forever in the thoughts and prayers of your mother.

EUT

You must apply to Mr. Chauncey for money if